Oh, Christmas

I am struggling. I am really hating how I, and it's me and no one else, feels the pressure to give gifts. I thought I made peace with all this, but as Christmas is nearing I find myself struggling. Why do I feel like this? Why has it been conditioned in our minds that we have to give to EVERYONE and their mom on Christmas? Here's my dilemma I love to give, whether it's Christmas or not. I have had to come to terms that sometimes I cannot do this, because Joe and I choose to live a different kind of life. We have chosen for me to stay home with our kids, and as our family grows so do the expenses. We choose not use our credit card and refuse to use it for Christmas buying especially. We live on a pastors salary. We are blessed, but is it wise and being good stewards of Gods money to go buck wild and buy for everyone that our hearts desire? I do not believe it is. We have landed on giving very little gifts. The gifts we give will be thoughtful and or useful,  and in a price range that are not too big.

This now leads to how we we hope to shape what Christmas looks like for our kids. I know that we will only give 3 kids. Just like the wise men gave to Jesus. What I would like this to kinda look like is one gift being something homemade. This year I will put my VERY beginning stages of learning to sew to use and make Owen a Lightning Mcqueen blanket. The second gift being something educational or useful. The last gift will be something fun.  We want to keep the season and especially the day focused on Jesus. Not gifts. We have not landed on the Santa thing. That is a whole other post. I will say we don't want to steal any kind of fun or magic, but I DO NOT want my children to focus on Santa and not Jesus. Just haven't made any solid decisions on this subject just yet.

This is my heart my honest heart.